Hello everyone and everybody. As of December 26th, 2011, Val'Kyr Studios is implementing new policies on how people view and access our videos. Some of them you guys may like, but perhaps you will hate all of them, considering the age of technology we live in these days. So without further ado, here are Val'Kyr Studios' new video policies.
1. Private Videos
There could certainly be the possibility of private videos in the future. We have considered doing them in the past, but could never really find a reason. The possible reasons for private videos are as follows.
A. Personal/Family footage not meant for the public eye (ie. video that family members wants to share via Facebook).
B. Highly sensitive topics that need to be tested among highly trusted viewers. These would be viewers who have shown an ability to look at topics (and the jokes made within them) with objectivity and not to instantly jump to conclusions, and can suggest improvements. Only the most extreme cases of sensitive topics (ie. Terrorism, The Military, Patriotism, or the IWK) would be subject to this rule. Note that ALL these examples are planned for release sometime in 2012.
Trusted viewers are currently listed below:
*EthantheRenegade
*Djxmonferno
*LylSweetsFairy
*Youcomeupwithone
*NightOfTheWereCat
2. New Uploading Schedule
While we are still not adhering to a regular upload frequency, we are going to apply a time for all uploads. All completed videos will begin their upload at 10:00PM Eastern Standard Time the day after they are completed. Upon completion of a video, a bulletin will be posted on the channel announcing the video's completion and time and date of upload.
NOTE: Non-RVI videos have a 30+ minute upload time, with another 30 minutes of processing. RVI's can have anywhere between a 40-120 minute upload time, with up to another 40 minutes of processing.
3. Mobile Playback No Longer Supported
With the advent of mobile internet and Youtube viewing, it was only after much consideration that we have decided to disable mobile playback on our videos from here on out.
Many of the most popular mobile devices remain to be the Ipod, Iphone, and Ipad (all Apple products). We at Val'Kyr Studios (and by "we" I mean "Only Jerry", but he owns the company) have some rather serious objections to Apple's products. Namely, their overpricing of gadgets that don't even support one of the very key ingredients of the Internet (*cough-Flash-cough*) simply because they cannot obtain the rights to moderate it. Couple this with the absurd price increase between a Mac and a PC sporting equal technical specs (and the games on OS X require twice the RAM and Video Memory) we cannot support their devices playing our videos.
The problem remains that there are many brands of mobile devices that are not owned by Apple (though Jerry has contempt for all of them, though for differing reasons) and Youtube only has one master swtich for mobile playback: All or None.
We have decided on the "None" option.
If you have been watching Rather Vocalized Illusion on mobile devices, you will no longer be able to view our future videos on those devices. This includes Web-Capable televisions and Console browsers. The only option to watch RVI is through your computer. We want to be a show you have to sit down at a laptop (or desktop) to enjoy (even your TV if you have an HDMI Cable). We just think it's better that way.
This may change down the line, but for now, this is how we will go forward.
Jerry "Bhaalspawn" Peet
Val'Kyr Studios
Sunday, December 25, 2011
Sunday, March 20, 2011
Rather Vocalized Illusion on: Upcoming Twilight Video
Now that I've gotten a new computer, I can start leaving more frequent updates on my blog. I guess the thing to talk about is what happened a couple of weeks ago.
I recieved an e-mail from a Twilight Fan Club (1 out of the eighty billion of them) asking for (and I'm not making this up) a "Fair and Balanced review of the series".
Now, we all know that while it makes a lot of money at the Box office, Twilight gets negative reviews from critics and society. I'll admit that a lot of the reviews can never seem to get off the "Sparkling Vampire" aspect of the story when there are a bunch of other things you can rip on as well. The story is poorly written, the romance is forced, and the characters are emotionless wooden puppets. But for all that, it continues to make money. The books even continue to sell a lot, but I think I figured out why.
That really says it all, doesn't it?
Now a 4-minute RVI isn't enough to talk about everything from the story that needs to be critisized but I do all that I can. The video will be coming out after The Arrogance of Age is released, which is nearing completion already. Thanks for reading, and enjoy the image.
I recieved an e-mail from a Twilight Fan Club (1 out of the eighty billion of them) asking for (and I'm not making this up) a "Fair and Balanced review of the series".
Now, we all know that while it makes a lot of money at the Box office, Twilight gets negative reviews from critics and society. I'll admit that a lot of the reviews can never seem to get off the "Sparkling Vampire" aspect of the story when there are a bunch of other things you can rip on as well. The story is poorly written, the romance is forced, and the characters are emotionless wooden puppets. But for all that, it continues to make money. The books even continue to sell a lot, but I think I figured out why.
That really says it all, doesn't it?
Now a 4-minute RVI isn't enough to talk about everything from the story that needs to be critisized but I do all that I can. The video will be coming out after The Arrogance of Age is released, which is nearing completion already. Thanks for reading, and enjoy the image.
Monday, August 9, 2010
Rather Vocalized Illusion on: Pop Music
Dearly beloved... we are gathered here today to say farewell to a dear and loyal friend. For today marks the death of Good Music. Yes, no matter how hard you may try to search, you will no longer find anything worth remembering in today's music industry. We are all saddened by this loss.
Well, enough with Mr Gloomeypants. Let's get right into it.
You remember how in the 70's and 80's there were lots of famous bands that were highly respected by all? Of course you don't. Because if Internet demographics are to be believed, none of my audience was born before 1992. Well for all you young listeners, back in the 70's and 80's, there were a number of bands that everyone loved and respected. Led Zeppelin, Alice Cooper, Micheal Jackson (cough-pedophile-cough), The Beatles, and Metallica. They were all amazing and respectable bands who played excellent music... except Micheal Jackson obviously.
Nowadays, the music features black guys dancing around ugly women, hookers parading around stage, and songs about absolutely nothing played with absolutely no music. Sometimes I like to look around and see exactly how far the world has fallen.
Now before I get really into it, I'd just like to say that I'm not going to talk about the music being inappropriate or anything, I'm talking about it being bad. Really really bad.
Some of this stuff is just really ridiculous. Look at that California Girls song. It's a song that has absolutely nothing to say, and the video features a bunch of women dancing around a remake of Candyland, which reminds me of a Black Eyed Peas song for some reason.
Another prime example is Alejandro. A song, again about nothing, that features no actual music and a video of Lady Gaga (cough-prostitute-cough) raping a bunch of guys.
Now many of you may disagree with me on this, but Music needs to feature five things. Rhythm, Tune, Instrumentals, Basial Amplification, and optionally Lyrics. Let's look at them in depth.
Rhythm is the beat that sets the tone and pace of the song. It let's the musicians time themselves accordingly and sync themselves up. Tune is the set of notes that gives the exact pitch for the song. It's the part of the song you hum when you're alone and bored. Instrumentals is the actual music that follows the rhythm and tune, and gives the song it's actual sound. It's played on instruments such as a guitar, or a violin, or a cello, or a piano. Basial Amplification is my fancy, made up term for bass. It's a low, quiet sound that makes the song sound full and lively. Played on a bass guitar, or tuba, or other such instruments. Lastly, Lyrics are a poem designed to add a meaning to the song, but this is optional.
Modern Pop Music does 1 and 5, and excessively uses 4, but still seems to struggle with 2 and 3. You see, for a song to really be memorable, it needs a powerful instrument in the background adding real emotion to a song, not just a series of sounds that sounds increasingly like someone spitting into their mic.
Pop Music also suffers from ending before it's over. In a rock song, part of the song will be dedicated to a guitar solo when the singer runs out of lyrics, before singing the chorus one last time. In a Pop Song, the last 2 minutes of every song is dedicated to repeating the title of the song over and over again. It's trying to make as much money as possible with as little effort.
Look at some of the songs coming out of European bands like DragonForce or Apocalyptica. They are really really nice songs to listen to... okay maybe not DragonForce (cough-StudioForce-cough), but Apocalyptica yes. In fact most of you probably know Apocalyptica as the band I start all my videos with. Their songs sound incredibly nice and their lyrical songs are ambiguously poetic.
Some of the best lyrical songs are the ones that still leave the music open to the imagination. You can take the lyrics any way you wish, and get any possible meaning out of them.
I'll show you an example of that. In the DragonForce song Prepare for War, the lyrics point out that the band is fighting something, but it's never made very clear. The ending chorus goes: Rage and Fear from skies above, the fire fuels my veins. Destruction of Humanity, the everlasting flame.
Now I showed that part of the song to three different people. One thought it was about the apocalypse, another thought it was about activism, and the third thought it was about religious extremism. You don't get that kind of variety in a Pop Song. The songs are almost always about hot women, and nothing else. Though the term "Hot" is kind of subjective, depending on what you consider Hot to be.
I know what you're going to say "Bhaalspawn, you classical music elitist! How can you say it's bad? It's just not in your taste. Other people might like it, so it could be good depending on your point of view." But I've never accepted that as a reason to not hate a song. It's an even bigger question of what kind of target audience these artists are looking for. Let me ask you something. Without saying something as vague as "Pop Music Fans", what is the target audience of Lady Gaga or Katy Perry? (cough-talentless cultural hack-cough). What is the target audience of this post-Montana Miley Cyrus? What is the target audience of any Pop Star? Nobody! These people don't have a target audience. The publishers know that. They put out this music knowing that the dumbest people in the world will buy what they tell them to buy and feed them billions of dollars in cash.
You've heard the term great minds think alike? Well idiots think in unison. You won't believe how many morons are at my school all dressed like black guys from BET.
It's less an issue of who writes and publishes this crap, but more of the kind of person who willingly pays money for it. I've asked people what they see in Katy Perry music, and they can't say anything beyond "It's cool", and they can never tell me why they think it's cool. These people don't even have a complete opinion on the kind of music they listen to. They're complete idiots who listen to it only because they are told to because everyone else is.
Now, I would be lying if I said I wasn't guilty of this myself. I enjoy some Evanescence every now and then, and I've found a few Billy Talent songs that I find catchy. But what sets me apart is I'm able to figure out why I like it, beyond saying "because it's cool". I'm able to recognize that every artist has at least one good song.
But that was my point form the beginning. Artists get one good, and extremely popular song at the start, and their publishers want to re-create that success again and again. TV Shows do this too, that's why TLC is having six different baking reality shows after the success of Cake Boss (cough-I just have to cough-cough). But just like with TV Shows, the copycats are never as good as the originals. The attempts to re-create success with the same formulas never get the same result. And the 2000's are more ignorant of this fact.
The 70's and 80's were full of One-Hit Wonders. Artists that had one good song or album, then quit while they were ahead. But nobody does that. Now we have bland songs that sound alike, with music videos that have nothing to do with the song anyway.
Well, enough with Mr Gloomeypants. Let's get right into it.
You remember how in the 70's and 80's there were lots of famous bands that were highly respected by all? Of course you don't. Because if Internet demographics are to be believed, none of my audience was born before 1992. Well for all you young listeners, back in the 70's and 80's, there were a number of bands that everyone loved and respected. Led Zeppelin, Alice Cooper, Micheal Jackson (cough-pedophile-cough), The Beatles, and Metallica. They were all amazing and respectable bands who played excellent music... except Micheal Jackson obviously.
Nowadays, the music features black guys dancing around ugly women, hookers parading around stage, and songs about absolutely nothing played with absolutely no music. Sometimes I like to look around and see exactly how far the world has fallen.
Now before I get really into it, I'd just like to say that I'm not going to talk about the music being inappropriate or anything, I'm talking about it being bad. Really really bad.
Some of this stuff is just really ridiculous. Look at that California Girls song. It's a song that has absolutely nothing to say, and the video features a bunch of women dancing around a remake of Candyland, which reminds me of a Black Eyed Peas song for some reason.
Another prime example is Alejandro. A song, again about nothing, that features no actual music and a video of Lady Gaga (cough-prostitute-cough) raping a bunch of guys.
Now many of you may disagree with me on this, but Music needs to feature five things. Rhythm, Tune, Instrumentals, Basial Amplification, and optionally Lyrics. Let's look at them in depth.
Rhythm is the beat that sets the tone and pace of the song. It let's the musicians time themselves accordingly and sync themselves up. Tune is the set of notes that gives the exact pitch for the song. It's the part of the song you hum when you're alone and bored. Instrumentals is the actual music that follows the rhythm and tune, and gives the song it's actual sound. It's played on instruments such as a guitar, or a violin, or a cello, or a piano. Basial Amplification is my fancy, made up term for bass. It's a low, quiet sound that makes the song sound full and lively. Played on a bass guitar, or tuba, or other such instruments. Lastly, Lyrics are a poem designed to add a meaning to the song, but this is optional.
Modern Pop Music does 1 and 5, and excessively uses 4, but still seems to struggle with 2 and 3. You see, for a song to really be memorable, it needs a powerful instrument in the background adding real emotion to a song, not just a series of sounds that sounds increasingly like someone spitting into their mic.
Pop Music also suffers from ending before it's over. In a rock song, part of the song will be dedicated to a guitar solo when the singer runs out of lyrics, before singing the chorus one last time. In a Pop Song, the last 2 minutes of every song is dedicated to repeating the title of the song over and over again. It's trying to make as much money as possible with as little effort.
Look at some of the songs coming out of European bands like DragonForce or Apocalyptica. They are really really nice songs to listen to... okay maybe not DragonForce (cough-StudioForce-cough), but Apocalyptica yes. In fact most of you probably know Apocalyptica as the band I start all my videos with. Their songs sound incredibly nice and their lyrical songs are ambiguously poetic.
Some of the best lyrical songs are the ones that still leave the music open to the imagination. You can take the lyrics any way you wish, and get any possible meaning out of them.
I'll show you an example of that. In the DragonForce song Prepare for War, the lyrics point out that the band is fighting something, but it's never made very clear. The ending chorus goes: Rage and Fear from skies above, the fire fuels my veins. Destruction of Humanity, the everlasting flame.
Now I showed that part of the song to three different people. One thought it was about the apocalypse, another thought it was about activism, and the third thought it was about religious extremism. You don't get that kind of variety in a Pop Song. The songs are almost always about hot women, and nothing else. Though the term "Hot" is kind of subjective, depending on what you consider Hot to be.
I know what you're going to say "Bhaalspawn, you classical music elitist! How can you say it's bad? It's just not in your taste. Other people might like it, so it could be good depending on your point of view." But I've never accepted that as a reason to not hate a song. It's an even bigger question of what kind of target audience these artists are looking for. Let me ask you something. Without saying something as vague as "Pop Music Fans", what is the target audience of Lady Gaga or Katy Perry? (cough-talentless cultural hack-cough). What is the target audience of this post-Montana Miley Cyrus? What is the target audience of any Pop Star? Nobody! These people don't have a target audience. The publishers know that. They put out this music knowing that the dumbest people in the world will buy what they tell them to buy and feed them billions of dollars in cash.
You've heard the term great minds think alike? Well idiots think in unison. You won't believe how many morons are at my school all dressed like black guys from BET.
It's less an issue of who writes and publishes this crap, but more of the kind of person who willingly pays money for it. I've asked people what they see in Katy Perry music, and they can't say anything beyond "It's cool", and they can never tell me why they think it's cool. These people don't even have a complete opinion on the kind of music they listen to. They're complete idiots who listen to it only because they are told to because everyone else is.
Now, I would be lying if I said I wasn't guilty of this myself. I enjoy some Evanescence every now and then, and I've found a few Billy Talent songs that I find catchy. But what sets me apart is I'm able to figure out why I like it, beyond saying "because it's cool". I'm able to recognize that every artist has at least one good song.
But that was my point form the beginning. Artists get one good, and extremely popular song at the start, and their publishers want to re-create that success again and again. TV Shows do this too, that's why TLC is having six different baking reality shows after the success of Cake Boss (cough-I just have to cough-cough). But just like with TV Shows, the copycats are never as good as the originals. The attempts to re-create success with the same formulas never get the same result. And the 2000's are more ignorant of this fact.
The 70's and 80's were full of One-Hit Wonders. Artists that had one good song or album, then quit while they were ahead. But nobody does that. Now we have bland songs that sound alike, with music videos that have nothing to do with the song anyway.
Friday, June 11, 2010
Rather Vocalized Illusion on: Parenting
Sometimes it's nice to examine the basic inner workings of our past and have a good chuckle as people desperately try to make them work and apply in today's modern society. Like activists going on about racial equality when we already have a black president. And if there's always been something iffy about Parenting, it's the completely outdated methods in which so many people attempt to use today, and even the New Age methods that are having little no no effect. You see, what I've come to dislike about so many Parents nowadays is their sense of entitlement. The feeling that their children owe them something because they went through the stupidity of not using a fucking condom... or in the case of my parents: going at it like sex offenders all the fucking time.
Now, lately Yahoo Answers has been flooded with questions about Parenting, usually along the lines of "My kid is misbehaving! HELP!" People so desperate to be told what to do they can't think for themselves and develop their own methods for parenting. And you'd be surprised of some of the retarded answers that are given. I'll give you a few examples:
QUESTION: MY DAUGHTER IS CRYING IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT! WHAT DO I DO?
Random Answer: You should see a psychiatrist about that. Maybe they can give you medication to give her. If she's crying, she needs to be taught to stop.
Apparently it never occured to them that the girl might be scared of something, or maybe she had a nightmare, or maybe she just wants her mother. Here's another one:
QUESTION: MY SON YELLS AND THROWS THINGS AND KEEPS SAYING HE HATES ME! PLEASE HELP!
Random Answer: He needs to be taught proper behaviour. You are the adult, make him stop!
Here's a crazy thought. You ever try talking to your son about what's bothering them? Because it's obvious that something is!
The whole concept of "You are the adult, he is the child, he must obey you" has been a long used method of Parenting, but it's never as clear cut as that with children, isn't it? Children and Teenagers only obey who they respect, and they only respect someone who has earned that respect. In the 70's and 80's, it was standard practise to use corporal punishment on children, and demand they respect you "or else". But it's worth mentioning that many of the Parenting methods from that era died out for a good fucking reason. As the 90's and 2000's came along, they only proved effective as long as you were bigger and stronger than the child, which isn't always a garuntee.
Muscle and intimidation are not good ways to earn your child's respect. The best way to earn a child's respect is to simply be nice to them. Talk to them. Ask them what's bothering them when they start acting out, and work hard to make them believe they can trust you. Earning your child's respect is much easier than earning the respect of anyone else. You simply have to give them the same respect they give you.
Despite the denial of many, not all parents are good parents. Anyone who does not get respected by their children has obviously not earned it. Pushing out or fathering a child and keeping it alive long enough to know wether you're respectable or not does not garner respect in and of itself. Prisons keep their subjects alive too, that doesn't mean the people running them are any bit respectable. What many of these "respect me or else" parents want is the illusion of respect. They want their child to go through the motions and show them respect at all times, regardless of personal feeling. And going through the motions is not real respect, and real respect is only eroded through behaviours like this. The people who have to demand respect are always the ones who deserve it the least. Anyone who has destroyed the respect and affection that children give their caretakers so freely from birth deserves exactly what they've gotten.
Very young children have the amazing ability to be brutally honest with people. When you son or daughter calls you mean or a bully, then storms off, that's probably because you are. Now, while what a 3 year old considers mean compared to a 30 year old differ greatly, that's still the case to them. Children have a lot more to say than you might think.
Now, I'd like to give an example from my own life if you'll induldge me for a moment.
One day, I went to pick up my daughter from her Day-Care on my way home from school. When I got there, I heard from one of the teachers that she had been getting into a fight with one of the other kids. They told me what happened, and then I went to find the two kids and ask them for their side of the story. When I did this, the teacher was confused as to why I was asking two toddlers what had happened. She called me out on poor parenting, which I tacfully ignored. Once I had the full story from all three, I was able to piece together what had happened and act accordingly.
Now, a lot of people might say "oh Children lie to avoid getting in trouble" but that's only when what they say isn't even being considered. Because I actually asked them for ther side allowed them to be honest with me. I know that because they both admitted to having a part in starting the fight. My genuine desire for their explaination showed them that I wasn't going to just take what the teacher said as face value, and that they could talk to me. This is what a parent is supposed to be able to do! Be someone their children can confide in, and be honest with. If you kid lies to you, that's only because you haven't shown that kind of understanding or caring.
When kids act out, psychiatrists try to attribute it to a mental illness and drug them up with medication. It's like kids aren't allowed to have feelings. They way so many people parent shows children that they're not allowed to be sad or angry. That they need to be happy and obiedient all the time. If they get angry at anything, then they'll be punished for it. Why do we do this to them? Why do we bold facedly tell them that what they think or feel doesn't matter? Like kids are somehow less human than adults are?
It's the whole concept of maturity and seniority. Parents will not listen to a word from anyone younger than them, as if being alive longer has somehow made them smarter or wiser. It's important to know that maturity is not based on knowledge, or degrees, or age. It's based on wisdom. There are a lot of very mature 14 year olds in the world, and a lot of imature middle-aged men. Perhaps the biggest sign of maturity is when you are wise enough to know that you are not mature. That you still have growing to do and things to learn. That there's the possibility that you could learn from someone younger than you.
Simply staying alive for 44 years doesn't instantly make you wiser than everyone under your age. Wisdom comes from being able to admit your mistakes, and being able to admit when you are wrong. It's not something that is a given just because you are older than another person.
If you as a parent think your child owes you something simply because you abide by the law and feed it, clothe it and shelter it, then you have missed the point entirely. You don't take care of your children because it's a future investment. You take care of them because you love them. If you think the care you give them as a child is something you should be re-imbursed for, then I personally feel sorry for your children.
I think every parent has potential. Any bad parent has the chance to redeem themselves in the eyes of their children. No parent is bad enough to never be forgiven. No one person could ever be condemmed as a horrible parent for life. (Remembers Joseph Fritzl) ...oh wait.
Now, lately Yahoo Answers has been flooded with questions about Parenting, usually along the lines of "My kid is misbehaving! HELP!" People so desperate to be told what to do they can't think for themselves and develop their own methods for parenting. And you'd be surprised of some of the retarded answers that are given. I'll give you a few examples:
QUESTION: MY DAUGHTER IS CRYING IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT! WHAT DO I DO?
Random Answer: You should see a psychiatrist about that. Maybe they can give you medication to give her. If she's crying, she needs to be taught to stop.
Apparently it never occured to them that the girl might be scared of something, or maybe she had a nightmare, or maybe she just wants her mother. Here's another one:
QUESTION: MY SON YELLS AND THROWS THINGS AND KEEPS SAYING HE HATES ME! PLEASE HELP!
Random Answer: He needs to be taught proper behaviour. You are the adult, make him stop!
Here's a crazy thought. You ever try talking to your son about what's bothering them? Because it's obvious that something is!
The whole concept of "You are the adult, he is the child, he must obey you" has been a long used method of Parenting, but it's never as clear cut as that with children, isn't it? Children and Teenagers only obey who they respect, and they only respect someone who has earned that respect. In the 70's and 80's, it was standard practise to use corporal punishment on children, and demand they respect you "or else". But it's worth mentioning that many of the Parenting methods from that era died out for a good fucking reason. As the 90's and 2000's came along, they only proved effective as long as you were bigger and stronger than the child, which isn't always a garuntee.
Muscle and intimidation are not good ways to earn your child's respect. The best way to earn a child's respect is to simply be nice to them. Talk to them. Ask them what's bothering them when they start acting out, and work hard to make them believe they can trust you. Earning your child's respect is much easier than earning the respect of anyone else. You simply have to give them the same respect they give you.
Despite the denial of many, not all parents are good parents. Anyone who does not get respected by their children has obviously not earned it. Pushing out or fathering a child and keeping it alive long enough to know wether you're respectable or not does not garner respect in and of itself. Prisons keep their subjects alive too, that doesn't mean the people running them are any bit respectable. What many of these "respect me or else" parents want is the illusion of respect. They want their child to go through the motions and show them respect at all times, regardless of personal feeling. And going through the motions is not real respect, and real respect is only eroded through behaviours like this. The people who have to demand respect are always the ones who deserve it the least. Anyone who has destroyed the respect and affection that children give their caretakers so freely from birth deserves exactly what they've gotten.
Very young children have the amazing ability to be brutally honest with people. When you son or daughter calls you mean or a bully, then storms off, that's probably because you are. Now, while what a 3 year old considers mean compared to a 30 year old differ greatly, that's still the case to them. Children have a lot more to say than you might think.
Now, I'd like to give an example from my own life if you'll induldge me for a moment.
One day, I went to pick up my daughter from her Day-Care on my way home from school. When I got there, I heard from one of the teachers that she had been getting into a fight with one of the other kids. They told me what happened, and then I went to find the two kids and ask them for their side of the story. When I did this, the teacher was confused as to why I was asking two toddlers what had happened. She called me out on poor parenting, which I tacfully ignored. Once I had the full story from all three, I was able to piece together what had happened and act accordingly.
Now, a lot of people might say "oh Children lie to avoid getting in trouble" but that's only when what they say isn't even being considered. Because I actually asked them for ther side allowed them to be honest with me. I know that because they both admitted to having a part in starting the fight. My genuine desire for their explaination showed them that I wasn't going to just take what the teacher said as face value, and that they could talk to me. This is what a parent is supposed to be able to do! Be someone their children can confide in, and be honest with. If you kid lies to you, that's only because you haven't shown that kind of understanding or caring.
When kids act out, psychiatrists try to attribute it to a mental illness and drug them up with medication. It's like kids aren't allowed to have feelings. They way so many people parent shows children that they're not allowed to be sad or angry. That they need to be happy and obiedient all the time. If they get angry at anything, then they'll be punished for it. Why do we do this to them? Why do we bold facedly tell them that what they think or feel doesn't matter? Like kids are somehow less human than adults are?
It's the whole concept of maturity and seniority. Parents will not listen to a word from anyone younger than them, as if being alive longer has somehow made them smarter or wiser. It's important to know that maturity is not based on knowledge, or degrees, or age. It's based on wisdom. There are a lot of very mature 14 year olds in the world, and a lot of imature middle-aged men. Perhaps the biggest sign of maturity is when you are wise enough to know that you are not mature. That you still have growing to do and things to learn. That there's the possibility that you could learn from someone younger than you.
Simply staying alive for 44 years doesn't instantly make you wiser than everyone under your age. Wisdom comes from being able to admit your mistakes, and being able to admit when you are wrong. It's not something that is a given just because you are older than another person.
If you as a parent think your child owes you something simply because you abide by the law and feed it, clothe it and shelter it, then you have missed the point entirely. You don't take care of your children because it's a future investment. You take care of them because you love them. If you think the care you give them as a child is something you should be re-imbursed for, then I personally feel sorry for your children.
I think every parent has potential. Any bad parent has the chance to redeem themselves in the eyes of their children. No parent is bad enough to never be forgiven. No one person could ever be condemmed as a horrible parent for life. (Remembers Joseph Fritzl) ...oh wait.
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